Converted by Our Lady: Saint Peter, Prince of the Apostles

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We frequently come upon the poignant narrative of St. Peter’s conversion. And yet, what is the real background to this great event?

Newsroom (01/07/2022 12:00 PM, Gaudium Press ) Darkness covered the sky; it was night for all humanity. Nature groaned in mourning for the most horrendous of crimes: deicide. In the holy city, silence seemed to reign. Earlier, many of the dead had arisen and appeared to reproach the inhabitants of Jerusalem for such an infamy committed.

On that same Friday night, a noble Lady prayed and meditated on all that had happened, and a virginal young man slept a sleep, heavy with the memory of the events, but at the same time light and tranquil for feeling close to Her who was now, more than ever, his Mother. They were Our Lady and St. John the Evangelist. During the first night’s vigil they had spent every waking hour in considerations of the whole august and poignant event that had taken place. Jesus had indeed died, but by His death He had destroyed the power of darkness and opened for us men the gates of Paradise closed by our first parents. The story of our Redemption was soon to reach its climax. In just three days our Saviour would rise again!

It is in this context that the conversion of the Prince of the Apostles, St. Peter, took place. This is how Msgr. João Scognamiglio Clá Dias expresses it in his book, Mary Most Holy! God’s Paradise Revealed to Mankind:

Zealous Mother of Mercy

During the last vigil of the night, something like a whisper woke St. John and impelled him to go carefully to the front door of the house. The dense darkness of dawn still covered that criminal Jerusalem of which the Divine Master had said: “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone the messengers of God, how often I have desired to gather your children together as a hen shelters her brood under her wings, but you would not!” (Lk 13:34). The deicidal city was granted as a prize the Blood of its Lord, and its infidelity led the Apostle to desire to go out into the marketplaces shouting like a prophet: “You shall receive the wages of your sin!”

Returning to the room where he had rested, he saw, however, a Star that pierced the darkness. The Light of Jerusalem – not of this earth, but coming down from Heaven – shone like a radiant sun, a very pure crystal, a golden ornament fashioned by God, awaiting the dawn of the glorious day of the Resurrection. It was Mary, his Mother, who prayed. Our Lady longed to meet each of the Apostles and disciples of Jesus in order to flood them with her forgiveness, but none of them had the courage to challenge the darkness of the streets of Jerusalem, steeped in the sin of deicide, nor to face their own shame for having abandoned the Divine Master.

Eager to win back those whom She rightly considered as children as much as St. John, She took the initiative to visit them mystically in order to comfort their hearts overcome by fear. That night they all felt her most holy presence infusing them with deep repentance. This gave them courage not to despair in their dramatic situation and prepared them to seek her forgiveness. A great lover of the hierarchy, the Mother of Mercy, with her maternal zeal, sought out above all the one whom Jesus had instituted as His Vicar and Head of the nascent Church, Simon Peter, who wept bitterly for having denied his Master three times because of his human respect.

Contemplating that Light that shone before his eyes, St. John discerned the perfect image of the Son of God engraved in the Heart of his Lady. There He was the only true and living Temple, and at His side persevered only the son whom She loved most, and whose firm determination was to keep watch over the Cross which still remained in Mary’s soul. Noticing his presence, the Blessed Virgin called St. John to her side again, for, in order to relieve the longing that pressed upon her maternal Heart, She wished to tell him various episodes from the childhood of the Child Jesus, which symbolized or were connected with the events witnessed during the Passion.

Soon the darkness of the criminal Jerusalem would begin to dissipate, chased away by the dawn of the Sabbath that would shortly arrive.

A “sacramental” gaze

During the conversation, a knock sounded at the entrance of the house, breaking the silence of that late night. It was Simon Peter, who wished to meet Our Lady. As soon as the door was opened to him, the cock crowed, announcing his arrival and he increased the intensity of his bitter weeping… with apostolic frankness and great brotherly affection, St. John reminded him:

“Lord, I will lay down my life for Thee!”... Weep now, Peter, for He who saved you from the waters is no longer here to rescue you. Weep now for He who washed your feet, cleansing your sins.

The Beloved Disciple understood well that the Prince of the Apostles coming forward to confess his betrayal meant that, at last, he was able to recognize his weakness and seek in the darkness the only Light that remained lit.

How had he found the strength to seek Our Lady that very night? He did not have the strength to follow in the footsteps of the Divine Master; much less had he courage. However, while the Son of God suffered the cruel pains of the Passion, Peter followed His torments from afar, for the gaze received from Jesus had indelibly engraved itself on his soul. On that occasion he heard an inner voice saying to him: “Wherever they take Me now, they will also take My Church, of which I have made you the Head”. Without the strength to respond to the invitation to join in the redemptive holocaust, he found refuge in tears, to the point of understanding that only the Blessed Virgin would be able to contain them. The only way to strengthen the nascent Church, which had witnessed the Death of its God, was to follow Mary, not at a distance as She had done with the Immolate Lamb, but very close to her Merciful Heart. But the first Pope’s conscience was weighing him down beyond all measure because of his fault… only the prayers of the Advocate of sinners were able to draw him.

It was enough, therefore, to lead him to the Mother of Jesus She arose, greatly consoled, looked at Peter with motherly affection and immediately broke down the doors of his hard heart. As the tears purified his soul, something like a light came from Our Lady and found in his interior a place for forgiveness. The Apostle fell on his face, and at the same moment the cockerel crowed again, making him groan all the more vehemently. Without saying a word, the gaze of the heavenly Lady made the Word of God reign again on that rock.

Mary’s gaze, therefore, has a sacramental and divine note that leads us to reflect on a series of marvels of her soul. Our Lord had pardoned St. Peter when they met in the Praetorium, but something of that pardon needed to be completed by His Mother. When the Apostle came to Her, She said nothing, only looked at him. That was enough to revive in his sinful soul the grace of the Papacy and convert him, with a power that sanctifies, pardons, restores, corrects, elevates … After all, who could describe all the effects of a glance from the Mother of God? The Light that terrifies the depths of hell, strengthens the wise and confirms the just, made the sign of the victory promised by Jesus shine in Peter’s soul: “I have prayed for you, that your confidence may not fail; and you, in turn, confirm your brethren” (Lk 22:32).

Our Lady then reminded him:

“My son, do you remember when you were in the Temple in your youth, undecided about your future and fearful for your salvation? I prayed for you even then, without even knowing you. Do you think that now I am going to abandon you?

These words, overflowing with affection and coming from a Heart pierced by the sword of sorrow, instilled unspeakable peace into Peter’s soul. Unlike the infamous Judas Iscariot, who hanged himself wallowing in the mud of treachery and obstinate pride, he experienced the unfathomable abyss of love that burned in the Heart of Mary. And he understood that in any situation in life, whether the state of his soul be good or bad, he would always find there an ocean of mercy, goodness and affection, provided he turned to Her with a contrite and humiliated spirit. An unbreakable bond was formed between the Mother of the Church and her Foundation Stone, by which the promise of the Divine Redeemer was consolidated: “The gates of hell shall not prevail against her” (Mt 16,18).

Little by little, Simon’s tears stopped, the light shone again in his soul, and forgiveness established in the fisher of men a throne of hope, filling him with courage to await the Master’s return. In a short space of time the Immortal Lady locked her Jesus in Peter’s heart forever. In turn, the sincere repentance of the first Pope soothed Mary’s pains.

It is because of this maternal action of the Mediatrix of All Graces that today we can celebrate throughout the world the Solemnity of so great a Saint! What would become of Peter’s fragile vessel if the “Captain” did not have this splendid Star to guide him through the storms and tempests of his own spiritual life? Let us pray for those who govern Peter’s ship today! May they too know how to look to Mary and carry out her will.

Compiled by Sandra Chisholm

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